Saturday, June 23, 2012

The Pursuit Of My Heart

It's been a long time since I've posted anything on this blog. Not long ago a friend of mine asked me if I was blogging anymore. That was a good and fair question to ask. I took a break. A much needed break from blogging. It's been good. It gave me time to clear my head and time to refocus.

 This past year has been tough. I'll not share the details, but the Lord has been working on me through it and showing me some things about myself that I didn't know were there. Some of it was good and some of it was ugly. Let me just say that the ugly wasn't very easy to take in or deal with, so it's taken a lot of time to deal with and process it all.

 I'm so very grateful to serve a God that loves me so much that He shows me the ugly. I'm so very blessed that He sent His Holy Spirit to dwell within me to whisper in my ear the hard things, convicting me until I fall to my knees in repentance. I'm so very undeserving of a Father that loves me just as I am! There's no telling what shape this blog will take in the future, but I do know that I'm being shaped and conformed more into my Savior's image.

On that note....
My firstborn, 16 year old, David, left early this morning for his first international mission trip.  He was so excited to go.  He'll be in the Dominican Republic for 9 days working in a school.  He'll be painting the school, going door to door in the area and working a VBS for a few days.  He'll get one leisure day where the team that he's with will get to go to the beach and do some shopping.  He asked for some words of wisdom late last night from me and my husband.  After thinking back to my first international mission trip I reminded him that the trip wasn't about him, but about the people he was going to serve.  I assured him that if he went with a mindset to truly serve others with the love of Christ, that the Lord in return would certainly teach him great things as well.  The things I learned on my first international mission trip still yield fruit in my life today.  I pray that this is the case with David as well as the rest of the team.

I'll leave with a prayer.  I was touched by it as it's so similar to what I wrote above (only much more eloquent) and where the Lord has been dealing with me.  A huge THANK YOU to my friend, "Cat", for posting this personal prayer on facebook for me to see, copy and paste!  :)

Lord, when I get distracted, when I get overwhelmed, when I get lured away, when I hide... I thank You for continuing to pursue my heart, to win it, to make it Your own. Thank You for surprising me with Your mercy. Thank You for whispering Your love in my ear, humming Your grace in my heart, and waiting for me in the secret places day after day after day after day after day after day.......